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Saturday, 17 March 2012

Men without Women = Farting is Acceptable at Dinner

After word got out that a guy with an 'HB' 'tache had arrived, girls flocked to the place
Once your out of Managua, and not in Granada, then Nicaragua is actually a beautiful and safe country, in fact among the most so i've ever seen. Thanks God the 15% Americans who have passports are the only one's you would actually want to speak with.

Im out here in a surf camp called Chancletas Hotel on wavos boom, Aserradores.
I'd rather not tell you about here but I suppose it's too late now

Imagine a place, where the sun shines every day. Where the 5 mile long deserted beach has some of the best surfing in the world. Where the steak and chips is amazing, and $9. Where your bed is $7.50 a night and the hammocks are free to snooze in all afternoon. Where you can forget to brush your hair in the morning, and the response to your dinner table farts is a shrug and smile, bringing you closer to the hallowed brotherhood of what it is to be man. This, dear friends is the austere monastry of life on playa Aserradores, where there isn't actually any village, just this collection of huts and a place to sit. Actually it wasn't me who farted. It was some American guy last night, but I liked it all the same.

I have not seen a woman for days here. I have seen lots of grown men calling each other dude and having bromances. All in all, a very good bunch of ...dudes. This is what life is like without women getting in the way and distracting us. Real things. Like surfing. And calling each other dude. And farting. Girls, you have no idea how important farting would be to men if you were not around to make us all self-concious of these things. My writing is likely to be all Ernest Hemingway soon. With short spare sentences. Only highlighting specific points.

Taking Lunch for a Walk

Right, enough of that - this is my life here to date (i.e. yesterday)

5.30am-  Wake and shower, a nice pancake and fruit and maple syrup with bacon and free coffee.
6am -  Re-drafting first 6 chapters of my novel.
9am - Go for a run along the beach, check out the waves.
10am - Work some more.
1pm - A most amazing steak and chips.
2pm - Read a little and rework next 6 chapters.
4pm - Go out and surf (badly) a little until sun begins to set.
6pm - Have a beer and some dinner (well it is Friday night).
8pm  - Go to bed.

Once I was accused of only ever doing sport and eating (thank you Kriddin) - as you can see, I often find time to write and make bad jokes too.

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